Zen-ing Out - Thursday, August 04, 2005 - Current mood: happy

Been doing the Zen master thing for the past month...trying to simplify my life, regroup reassess, and get plans B, C, D, etc. ready…..Interviewed and was rejected a second time by Conde Nast publications. The position was for an assistant to the SF corporate director (she used to work at Vogue in NY) and to the Sales Manager for Self Magazine. Surprisingly, I was actually only mildly disappointed when I found out they picked another candidate. I figured that so many other people applying for this position had more experience than me…Oh well, I’m sure I’ll land a a job that is decent and desirable eventually, especially since I’ve been actively applying to them for a year and a half now….. I really do appreciate the fact that I am employed, I know things could be a lot worse…Went to a few shows: The Lovemakers/ Chow Nasty (to support Joey and the Boys) and Outhud at Lobot, then ended up at a Chic Chic Chic/ Chow Nasty free show last night at Mezzanine after a very disappointing Hotel des Arts opening. I think we got there too late and so the hotel was starting to close the rooms to the public. So sad cause the one in May was so much fun...: (

So my birthday party was very fun and I think I only had six of the numerous drinks bought for me. Now that I’m almost thirty and I’m a recovering ulcer patient, I just can’t put them down like I used to..although I did somehow managed to drink 16 oz. of vodka at a party in July??….Saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I thought it was so cool and psychedelic. I was on visual overload that’s for sure. If this had come out when I was a teenager I would have been all over some hits of acid before the movie…oh, the good old days…..God, I’m such a closet hippie…oh yes, and participated in an overwhelming amount of family related functions. Got a hair cut and color. I’m now a light chestnut brown with blended blonde streaks. Eddy does such a wonderful job. He really is the best!

But the best best though was the Chloe Paddington bag (so real, the Nordstrom tags were still on it!!!) bag I bought at the Laney College flea market. It was like a total drug deal. I brought my pusherman the cash and he delivered the bag to me at starbucks in Alameda. And apparently the bags had to be escorted by security when they were being dropped off to stores in England (according to Theresa) because they are so highly coveted. It's so rad!! It even has its own article in Vogue, which proclaimed the brown one to be the "It" bag for Spring 05. It was pretty sick how good I felt after I bought it. The adrenaline rush from these kinds of deals feels so good! It make me feel a little dirr-tay! I love it!!!!

So plans B, C, D, etc. I’m not quite sure yet as to they will entail, but I would like to quit my job, do an internship at a magazine here, and live off of the profit sharing money/unused vacation time /credit card/part-time job, until I am able to get a full-time job in the industry. Or Conde Nast can call be back to interview for another position in their sales office and pick me this next time.
We shall see. I suppose I just have to remain patient and optimistic, and keep working at it, and to make sure to have fun all the while. Guess that’s life in a nutshell. Damn, spoken like a true Zen Master...You see, the Zen-ing out is really working...