Animal Control….July 24, 2007 - Current Mood: Snacky

It’s been non-stop since the 4th of July – and the month is already almost over! Started with Drew’s 4th of July BBQ and mini D.I.Y. fireworks show. Then Reina’s b-day party at Levende with Errico & the Misscrewers, and Liz and Danny joining in at 3am for Mexican breakfast bonding. Then there was Sara’s Planes, Trains, Automobiles themed housewarming party – where I observed a cycle of very young almost hipster kids trying to be too cool for school but desperately an uncomfortably not quite making the mark. Low point of observation is when I heard someone state they had to go “check on their playlist” to make sure it stayed with the theme of the party and would be devastated if a mismatched song made it in ……There was Kevin’s 30th b-day BBQ, and the most interesting part of the night happened to be when James was walking Kelly and I to Bart and Alfie the Troll Window man at 18th and Valencia waved to me and opened his window and gave us a private 10 minute interview, which I found absolutely fascinating. http://www.sftrollwindow.blogspot.com/ . Watched Grey Gardens a documentary made in the 70s about the ever reclusive and eccentric mother/daughter duo, the Edie Bouvier Beales, living in their dilapidated East Hampton 28 room mansion. The Chow Nasty album release party at the Independent was incredibly fun, and then Chow Nasty kick off tour BBQ at the house was a good time full of good eats (chicken apple sausage stuffed with gouda and bacon wrapped jalapeño poppers were the hit dishes). Did a lot of shopping this week, had a happy birthday massage. My Vessel Hip Hop birthday party got postponed due to a change in plans, and my cousin’s bachelorette party was a great celebratory time, nails did, dinner, dancing, perks being a room at the Clift and some large Hermes gift boxes I’ll use for storage that I found in its hallway.

On my mind this week:

1. I had no idea lap dances were given at the Independent. I was seated on a chair after the Chow Nasty show, when my sister yelled out jokingly, “This girl needs a lapdance!” and a Sam came over and gave me a pretty good one.

2.

How does your garden grow?

3.
From this………….

To this…



To this……

…….is genius at work. God bless Malcolm Mclaren.

4. The Kwans are sad cause our family dog, Wing, Wing is missing. She got out of the yard Friday night and hasn’t been seen since. If anyone sees a half Rott/Terrier mix with a flippy tail running around Alameda, please let me know.

5. I truly have awesome friends and family. Thanks for all the birthday wishes and treats!

Das Boots.....July 4, 2007 - Current Mood: Pink, Cream, & Cerulean

Lots of family related stuff going on the past couple weeks. One family bridal shower, father’s day breakfasts, brunches, birthdays and dinners, then hung out with my cousins and their baby. There was Lindsey’s birthday party then Melinda's house warming party – the place is cavernous, full of massive stained glass windows, and some even being rumored to have come from the Liberace estate…..It’s really very otherworldly, and it ate my car keys and made Tee and I completely lose track of time, the sober chatter going way into the wee, wee hours of the morning. Saw my hair stylist Edwin at Hermosa in Berkeley, then me, him, and Dee went to see Shrek III, which was very much on the cute side as expected. Puss n' Boots used to be my favorite, but I think Gingy has taken the cake….Stayed home this weekend to do my chores and rest up for the next month or so, which will be absolute mayhem, but of the most positive kind of course.

on my mind this week:

1. Where the hell am I gonna do my birthday party?!!!! Need a place on specified dates with no cover, not too bourgsie, with a dancefloor, good music, in a reasonably safe location, with enough space to accommodate the party…. So please any suggestions are very much appreciated!!!

2. I see a lot of interesting things on my commute. Lately I’ve been fascinated by the following:

The Skeleton Lady - You can tell she is a professional of some sort, I see her on my bus ride in walking up Sutter. Poor thing, she clearly has an eating disorder. Everytime I see her, it reminds me of why it is okay to eat and even justifies some of my overindulgent eating behaviors. Her skin looks like it sliding off her face and her body – it has nothing to hold onto. She wears white orthopedic sneakers and carries a Louis Vuitton Alma bag. I wonder what she eats for lunch. I wonder if she even eats lunch…

Highlighter Boy - Every morning he looks like he is on a scavenger hunt. It never fails; he fervently crosses off items on a notepad while walking up Sutter, and ALWAYS with a highlighter. Sometimes pink, sometimes yellow - guess it depends on his mood. The day he uses a black Sharpie, I’ll have the fear of God in me, or something like that.

3. This is why I need to take my ass dancing………


4. Gosh, I really miss my wifey Liz!!

5. I’ve had this terrible obsession with slutty 90’s pants for a while……

6. Oh snap, I forgot all about this until the other day...



7.
Speaking of which, I got the most beautiful Coach boots on sale the other day ($400 off!!!)Couldn’t be happier about the start of my winter wardrobe!!! :):):)

Party Mammals & Mythical Creatures……June 13, 2007 Current Mood - Leotarded

Being sick kept me in for a weekend, so last week was nice and chill. Lost my cell phone for 12 hours earlier this week, but was lucky enough to have a very kind stranger pick it up and return it to me, which was such a relief. This past week was oodles of fun, and the party was definitely not over at The Party is Over, Joey and Craig’s art opening and Joey’s birthday celebration at Mission 17. Mosied on over to the Coppola’s house party across the street, remembering that I do indulge in Malibu Rum and cokes once in a while, then headed over to 111 Minna to see Misscrewer DJ Zita (who played a really awesome mash up set!!) spin at the Juxtapoz Magazine party with the Misscrew posse (Liz, Gabriella & Ali, Reina) + Danny, Errico, Jake, and Josh. So kinda fucked up shit has been happening to me at 111 Minna lately, whose selection of DJs and security I’m more of a fan of compared to its bizarro crowd, a mix of 40% decent, 20% cool, and 40% absolutely horrible patrons, of which I will spare you the gory descriptive details of cause it’s not worth the time, and I’m sure you’re already quite aware of if you go there. So anyhow, the other night we went to support Misscrewer DJ Zita, and while dancing a couple things happened to my dismay…….firstoff, this total tool of a dude asked if he could wear the fluorescent surfer printed vintage Speedo jacket I was wearing, I told him no, then I felt bad, so I let him dance it in for a brief moment, but then his drunk ass had the audacity to go into my purse, a complete stranger!, and wear my jacket again after I had asked for it back, which is when I lost my patience……I’m generally a very nice person, but when provoked, all hell will break loose - I had to punk him for having no manners, and his female friend for allowing his totally disrespectful behavior, and I would have really tried to beat his ass if further agitated. Thank God Errico stepped in to regulate….So it’s been an interesting week full of better and restful sleep (been making myself work out again), insightful observations and thoughts, nonsensical bedtime conversations with my homegirls, Tee and Liz, and psychic dreams about jewelry.

On my mind this week:

1. It’s really not cool, and very rude and assuming when complete strangers, and total douche bags at that, barge their way into our dance circle, when the boys leave. Oh hell no.
2. Food poisoning from deli Tabbouleh salad is not a good party.

3.

(Part starts at 5:07)- Haahhhaaa, leotards rule! Think I just seen Sporty Spice.....

4. I have a friend named Gerald, and every time the Dee and I see him, we now use our 1920s voices and hand gestures as if grappling a speakeasy martini…..”Ha ha ha…..Gerald…”


5. Damn, what is cooler than Jeff Bridges, I dunno...



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCZhAPMfZAU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieDBRuk8yaY

M.I.S.S. Demeanors……May 30, 2007 Current Mood – Unruly

The past couple weeks have been filled with marathon socializing. Started with the O’Reilly’s Oyster festival last week, really wonderful to have our annual visits from Steve and Steph, and Wes and Jessica, and so good to finally have met Brie, and to hang out with Jesse and Sophie, Adrian, Dan, Edwin, and the Dee and the rest of the crews. It was a crazy good time, starting with the car ride over, and included some intense establishment hopping, karaoke and dancing, and ended with last call at the LW. Later in the week, I went to see the Giants for a media work related event, and then Dee and I did sister bonding at the De Young, catching the Vivienne Westwood exhibit and purchased some very cute earrings (Swarovski crystal skull and crossbones) of hers as well. Had drinks at the LW with Tee, and then Danny’s Dirty Thirty/Moving Away BBQ party was pretty hardcore, like 10 hours straight of hanging out and catching up with old friends, and then finally catching the office cold I’ve been dodging for two weeks now.

On my mind this week:

1. I think I should be allowed to enjoy my Friday afternoon and talk excitedly to old friends on public transportation, however there is a bus Nazi who thinks otherwise.

2. There is nothing more awkward than a very drunk person trying to kiss you that you’re not really sure you want to kiss. Closed eyed, lips puckered in the air approaching like bombs on televised radar. Not good.

3. I’ve started the planning for my birthday party. Hope it will be at least this much fun!


4. I almost cried when I saw the Vivienne Westwood exhibit, but stopped myself out of the fear of looking like one of those crazy Michael Jackson fanatics, but now I think I kinda get them...anyhow, you must see it before it leaves the De Young on June 10th, and pssssst! It’s only $5 when you show a BofA card!!!

5. Tee told me last night she is convinced I’m gonna marry some sort of royalty and become a European socialite, but I think I’m much too much a rebel for this sort of behavior. I’d take the shoes though any day. Anyhow, I’m more like these guys:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWiilrBq9vw


6. Although, I think I’m just about due for one of these……

Mi vida loca…..May 16, 2007 Current Mood – Earrings not jingling at the moment :(

The Chow Nasty show on Cinco de Mayo at the WC was a good time. Sugar and Gold were really good too. I was impressed. Good to see old friends and new – hadn’t been there since that crazy Halloween party in 2004 when me and Brandon dressed up as Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love, and then the other Ghostown happening was not so happy. Someone totaled my Dad’s car in front of his shop on MLK – he had to dive out of the speeding car’s way, and then the jerk took off on foot. It’s amazing he wasn’t seriously injured, and just another reason to buy a trusty Camry. Then on the other side of Oakland, Liz, Errico, Danny and I did taco truck bonding, over ceviche and lengua tacos. Brandan and Chris’ birthday BBQ extravaganza at Dolores Park was ever-so-much fun, and happy to know my blue raspberry jello shots were a hit among the fellas! Then Evelyn’s wine tasting party after was a hoot and very educational, learning that Red Truck pinot noir is an extremely versatile wine at a good value ($10 for 2005 bottle)…..So I’m pretty tired this week, and apparently I have highly allergic tissue in my eyes, and I will soon have some not so attractive Calvin Klein riveted lens titanium computer glasses to help them out, and that you will never ever see me in, thank god - but I will also have me some new stunnas too, so I’m pretty excited, and excited for this weekend’s Oyster festival!

On my mind this week:

1. So many Taurus/Geminis and so little time!!! I’m really trying, I promise!!
2. I love it that Tee is a like a little baby! Oh honey, your poor ears!! Kooo, gurgle, gurgle…
3. The M.I.S.S. Crew got a hot new look for summer!! Check it out: misscrew.com
4. Muni is an interesting place, especially when you’re trying not to make eye contact with someone who was with the ninny who thought you were a man. As you can see this is still a very sensitive subject.
5. Goat milk brie is absolutely delicious at room temperature, and is only $3 a wheel, so get it fast before your local TJs sells out or discontinues it.


6. Too bad the narration on this trailer is kinda horrible, but it looks like it’s gonna be an excellent movie. I love Edith Piaf, I’m so excited!!! It will be hard to wait until it comes out June 8th!!


7. Hell yeah! Ladies Love Cool J….and the earrings will be jingling soon!!! :)


8. What’s your sign? he,he,he…anyone else hear Streetfighter in the background…Oh shiattt!!!

The Freaks come out at night…April 30, 2007 - Current Mood - winky

In the past couple weeks I found myself at Emily’s art opening at Transmissions Gallery, where the pieces were dark, whimsical, and charming, and the band, Continental, was skillfully jamming away. That night I wore my red leather Thriller jacket and hoochie red leather pumps with 90’s bling buckles, so my attention span was not happening cause my Michael Jackson dance moves in inappropriate places were,..,..Went to the Mallard for a sec after, then ended up at the LW for last call….Liz and I decided to get lunch at the flea market Sunday, which for me consisted of a pork tamale, a lengua taco, and two scoops of Mexican ice cream in a waffle cone. Ran walked Denise’s two very hyper, Beagles, and got a house tour, and finally got to bear witness to the Robles’ “million dollar” bathroom. Ended up at the Hush Hush the other night night with Dee, Sara, Jason, Ida, and Kelly, which was kinda like bizarro night there. First, I walked in on a group of unfriendly fortysomethings doing coke in the bathroom cause they didn’t bother to lock the door. Then these same people were celebrating a birthday with full on, bare buttocks on the bar, birthday spankings...it was a bit of a disturbing sight - total birth control!!

On my mind this week:

1. Coincidences are weird and sorta funny....and so many lately that it’s kinda spooky...

2. There was no Michelle and Liz booties at this month’s Bootybassment, so come May there will be some double, triple, quadruple, quintuple, sextuple trouble on the Knockout’s dancefloor that’s for sure!!!

3. For someone who is quite cryptic, I take what people say very literally because I am extremely gullible.

4. Despite yesterday’s snack with Dee and Joey, I’m still having my Wienerschnitzel attack!!

5. I forgot Beyonce had a last name...Dee thought this was funny...

6. Theresa and Liz, you ladies are throwing off my schedule!! See what happens when
I miss you guys!!

7. Opening sequence to The Hunger

Add to My Profile | More Videos

Hats are so hot right now...

8....umm I actually own a couple versions of this outfit....

I found it, and it’s more fabulous than I had even imagined! Thanks Joey!! ;)

Real trannies don’t have hips…April 17, 2007 - Current mood: Content

The past couple weeks of extreme socializing have left me exhausted, but very happy and strangely somehow healthy. Started with Moua’s birthday party, then 111 Minna after where this random guy decided to sit next to me, and what happened next still has me feeling a bit traumatized. (Keep in mind here I was wearing a very fitted vintage sixties cocktail dress, in silk crepe, a kind of fabric that clings to the hips, and the same amount of make-up I always wear.) So he kept asking me how old I was, which I told him, then he kept telling me I looked 22, said I had a nice face, then asked me if I was a girl…and THEN proceeded to buy me a drink that I didn’t ask for, that was 50% correct in body because he didn’t let me finish my sentence. And then kept saying over and over that we should go to Vessel…then this guy got freaked out by Ryan, thought he was my boyfriend, saying he gave him the evil eye….This is when Liz and I kindly made our escape to the dancefloor thanks to Dylan the DJ who saved us with New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle, which was actually quite representative of that very awkward and ill-fated moment. Later in the week there were drinks at the LW with Theresa, Ryan P., Jenny, Jeff, Dee, Melinda, Amy….Then Gia and Gemma’s bounce house Tinkerbell birthday party across the street at Dean and Rene’s … Actually had to do the party in 2 shifts with a nap in between. On Easter, decorated Easter eggs with the fam, enjoying Easter brunch, and Easter dinner and ate, and ate and ate. After Easter more amazing meals followed, and included a wonderful dinner of Chinese Oxtail soup and Toro (fatty tuna) and Korean BBQ in West O with the fam, Thai Osha with Mei, and Ruby Skye for a media work related event (Harrah’s/ Harvey’s Lake Tahoe) and enjoyed a nice mini cabaret show and buzz that I took with me later to an art show in Jack London.

On my mind this week:

1. I have yet to go there, but Vessel does not look fun. Not my idea of a hyphy time. For work however, David and I are considering maybe planning a corporate event there.
2. People slang all sorts of stuff at the Laney college flea market, but last Sunday was the first time we were approached with Chiuauas….so painfully cute, and a painful $250 a pop…er a pup! Have you ever met my friend corny Collins…..
3. Bootybassment is sooooo on on Saturday!!! Yess!!! I’m so EXCITED I already know what pants I’m gonna wear!!!!
4. The best part of the week though was when M.I.S.S. Liz informed me of a write up my Sunday M.I.S.S. Crew Beauty blog posting received on the Around the Way Girls blog, which is awesome and informative in the ways of fashion and pop culture. Really feels good to know people enjoy and appreciate what I do. Thanks so much Radio Rose!! 
http://aroundthewaygirls.blogspot.com/2007/04/vapor-rub-for-your-feet.html

5. The flea market was crazy yesterday. Something funny I overheard was:
I had said outloud to my sister, “It smells like pot right here.” Passing right next to us was a middle aged couple. The wife said, “It smells like a skunk.” The husband replied, “That’s not a skunk, that’s grass.” Guess you had to be there.

6. Jungle juice and the bounce house are a very fun, yet tiring combination, and is best when you live across the street.

7. I LOVE this video cause it’s so cute, and Peaches is so much fun, and our Joey is in it too…And JD from Le Tigre, now she is a fo’REAL tranny.



8.



Funny how things don’t change much….There will always be Bunny Bixlers and Muriel Peuses, but there is only one Auntie Mame….a favorite of the all the Kwans.